How do Russian women and men feel about Russian Bride sites?

Question

Do you find them flattering? Degrading?

Answer 1

Most of these answers are pure opinion, based on American cultural perceptions.



First, I am married to a wonderful Ukrainian woman, and we do some translation, scam investigations, and interpreting work in this area.



A great majority of Russian and Ukrainian women do not have access to the internet, and have no idea such sites exist. Most of my wife's friends usually say they can not believe a man 10,000 miles away would want to meet a Russian/Ukrainian woman in real life.



Just like we have the false stories of "Russian Brides seeking green cards", they have the stories of "American men seeking Russian women for prostitution". Although this happened a lot in the past, it does not happen much anymore (at least with the US and Britain) due to the visa requirements.



The women do not view it as "degrading", they view it with disbelief. The Russian/Ukrainian men, on the other hand, view such sites as pure "prostitution". They also dislike "their women" being with Western men.



Most (if not all) of these "free dating" sites have nothing but scammers (and they are usually men, pretending to be women). However, there are many reputable sites. You will also find the newspapers there filled with advertisements from Western men looking for women. Again, the women do not believe that a man would really travel around the world to meet a woman.



As to the post that says "men going there must have problems meeting women in their own country", that is certainly a biased opinion. Most American women can not understand why men are drawn to Eastern European women, and most would call me sexist.



Believe me, no man would go through what it takes to bring a woman to the United States or Britain unless he was very serious with that woman. And quite honestly, it is difficult to find an American woman with the moral values that an Eastern European woman has.



If I was looking for a slave housewife, I certainly picked the wrong woman. I will say that under her guidance of our family, we have a healthy bank account, our bills are paid, our family is healthy, and we are both very comfortable with our lives. In actuality, we live in Ukraine as a choice rather than the US.

Answer 2

Sorry, but this is SO wrong. Except in some very RARE instances: A. You cannot "fall in love" or know if someone is right for you from a picture. B. Picking a wife from a picture is BEYOND shallow - we are talking shallow plus 10 here. It is also pathetic. Dating, fine. Wife, no way. Unless, of course, you are a masochist. C. Marrying someone without knowing them and dating them for at least 1 year is ASKING for trouble and is basically masochistic behavior expressing a lack of self-confidence and self-esteem. D. With all the online dating sites and woman to chose from, the fact that you cannot find "what you are looking for" even though you are an "attractive guy" is a red flashing light. Suggests either (1) you are NOT all that attractive, either physically or in your personality, (2) you are socially inept, (3) "what you are looking for" is unreasonable or shallow or creepy or odd, and/or (4) you have some other issues. Picking a russian bride is not going to magically make this go away or change - woman are woman, whether russian, asian or whatever. E. Picking a russian bride and your mention of how much you earn suggests that you are so creepy (or think you are so creepy) that the only way you can get a quality woman is if she is desperate for material security - only you aren't sure if $40,000 is sufficient material security to buy you the wife you want. And we are talking about buying and controlling here, not love. Again, big mistake. You can't buy love. And if you are wanting the possessive control, that's just creepy and abusive. My advice: (1) If you have some good friends you can trust to be honest with you, talk to them and ask them to tell you honestly what they think of your plan, your attractiveness to women, your social behavior, husband potential, dating issues, etc. Write down or record what they say and DON'T GET ANGRY or make comments other than to encourage them to explain any statements, instead just listen, be encouraging and thank them afterwards for their honesty. Then give yourself time to get objective and listen to the recording or read the notes again a few days later. (2) Get some counseling to help work out your issues, whatever they may be. If you have behavioral issues, try cognitive behavioral therapy - it works. The world would be a better place if everyone did this. (3) Try some local dating services and instead of looking for Ms. Perfects, just look for some Ms. Reasonably Attractives and get out there and date, because practice makes perfect. (4) Follow Gentlemen's example and really get to know any potential mate first. If you are an abusive controlling creep, I hope you eat **** and die and that none of these girls gets sucked into your web and bad cess to you. If you really are basically a good guy, I hope it all works out for the best and good luck to you.

Answer 3

There are plenty of these kind of web sites and i think that only a few, who can really meet someone over there. This is the business that gives money to the one, who starts it, - rarely when people are really bothered about someone who can't find the right match.

But, in truth, if a one had some problems about that, why not to try? There are so many cases of unhappy females, who faced with greater problems after taking that serious step.



Only the name of "Russian Bride" makes that wrong image on the topic itself - females are all the same everywhere: beautiful or ugly, good or bad - doesn't matter what the nationality she is or what religion she is...



In my opinion all these web sites and advs give an absoluitely wrong image about the whole nation. Other people think of something that, in truth, even doesn't take a place ina particular country.



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Answer 4

Very interesting question! I certainly can't answer as a Russian woman, but I can answer as a mentor for a Russian woman who spent most of her life in Estonia. The web is full of ads from the women who trully believe they "MIGHT" have a chance at a better life. They find out very quickly that American men are no different than the rest of the world. They do perceive that we are rich in comparrion to the local men and they perceive we are not as brutal in our aggression and drinking. I think you will find many matches that are good!! USMC 60-68

Answer 5

I don't know. Naive Russian girls think that they really can "dig gold" attending that kind of sites. Most of them are sure that foreign grooms are better.

But wait a minute. If a man goes to a Bride site... doesn't it mean that he has problems with women in his own country?

Mostly they marry Russians just to have free good-looking housemaid.

Answer 6

Those websites malign and denigrate Russian men in the most vile ways. So you can probably imagine how Russian MEN feel about them. Although, the persistent myth about virtually every single American male marrying a Russian woman and American women supposedly going around sad and lonely is a source of pride for some.



As for women, I am a little more conflicted there. I am a Russian woman by origin, but an American woman in actuality. I think these sites are more offensive to me as an American than as a Russian. They are also offensive to my intelligence, as they most blatantly misrepresent Russian culture and mores. Finally, they offend me as a human being because they openly cater to abusive and controlling men.



Kevin: It's hilarious how, being the only non-Russian American to have answered this question, you dismiss the answerers of RUSSIAN extraction, who were raised in the RUSSIAN culture and speak RUSSIAN as their first language, for being supposedly ignorant of Russian culture, and basing our opinion on "American cultural perceptions". Yeah. How would WE, of all people, know anything about Russia? Ty chto, muzhik, beliny ob'jelsja? Your answer exemplifies the delusional attitudes promoted by the mail-order marriage business.



If your wife is an agreeable woman and you are happy, good for you. However, you are wrong to imply that Eastern European women in general have better morals than American women. It is YOUR opinion that's based on American cultural perceptions; mine is based on the inside knowledge of both Russian and Eastern European cultures, as well as continued contact with them. (And Ukrainian culture is very close to the Russian culture.) It has always amazed me how many people believe that far-away lands like Eastern Europe and Southeast Asia are places steeped in traditional AMERICAN values. So here are some FACTS for you for a change: In terms of percentages of marriages, Belarus has the highest divorce rate, followed by the Russian Federation. Ukraine is number five. The US, by contrast is twelfth. Ukraine has the world's highest abortion rate, ahead even of Russia, where abortions have outnumbered births for every year since 2000. And if you want to really know what Russian and Ukrainian women generally think about women's marital obligations, infidelity, etc., you should check out some Russian and Ukrainian-language websites. Start with www.women.ru, it's a good resource. After all, since your opinion is supposedly NOT based on "American cultural perceptions", but instead on your intimate knowledge of Eastern European cultures, I presume you at the very least speak the language(s)?



It's true, there is a big different in morality between today's Eastern European and American women -- just not in the way you suggest.

Answer 7

Degrading... a website that helps young russian gold diggers find a 'husband' just to get rich, by russian standarts anyway. Plenty of nice guys in Russia to marry, oh wait.. they're not rich :P

Answer 8

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